He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
