What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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