i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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