So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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