My friends, they love my intelligence
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
