I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize