No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
you didnt know i had herpes?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
