what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
