Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
