So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
