There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize