: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
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