i don't like sucking hair
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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