Don't you send me to vm
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
where are my eyebrows?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
