Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
My breasts were aching with rage.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
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