Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
how drunk are you?
Several
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize