What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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