things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize
