I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
