How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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