I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
