It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Randomize