I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
fuck your aforementioned shoe
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
