so explain again why im purple
no
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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