The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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