i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
The adults are the big ones right?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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