And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
