we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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