i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
