when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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