The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
