ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
