So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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