Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize