having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
