i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Randomize
