(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
