My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
