I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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