i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
