No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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