Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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