We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
...so i touched it.
if only i could text you this smell
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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