just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
