who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
babies were throwing up all over the place
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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