Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
