I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
We need to get me chipped asap
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
