just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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