HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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