With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
