So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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