I am in a vortex of obligation.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
