only if we run a train.
done.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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